Smith on politics

26th October 2009

The house that Tony Blair would buy has sixty-seven rooms and a copy of Hustler in each of seventy-two bathrooms. That’s all I know about that. Oh well, that and that the knockers are fat, wrought-iron twisted motherfuckers with a grin that says HALLELUJAH! You knock one of them fucks you’d best be ready to run: down the hill, through the trees and into the small cemetery in the old churchyard behind the church. You talk about Tony Blair’s bathrooms but that ain’t his house, he never did buy the house. The town is a small town and the house is an aberration and Tony - well I used to have a crush on Tony and on Bill. I like my men older, powerful, deceitful (obviously), with Napoleonic wives and big fat wrought-iron knockers on the doors of their would-be homes.

4 responses

  1. An Unreliable Witness comments:

    Next week on Panorama, Ani Smith examines Barack Obama’s knockers - er, I mean, critics.”

    [I wish all current affairs TV was like this post.]

  2. ellie comments:

    You slut. I was loyal to Bill. Tony is just a ponce.

  3. Ani Smith comments:

    AUW: I know, people should talk more about their crushes. I feel this would improve the world economic situation.

    Ellie: Slut and a half. Kinda had a thing for Al Gore too. They’re all ponces in retrospect.

  4. ellie comments:

    True. All of them. ;-)

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