I put it on a book and then I sat there.
18th February 2009I put it on a book. And then I sit there and I wait for it to beep. I write stuff, like this. I write this and then I shut it and I wait for it to beep. I write in long lines. No word wrap for me. I close it and I put it by my ear and I wait for it to beep and for the beep to seep into my brain through my ear canal. I write some shit, like this. I write this and I sit there and I wait and sometimes I wonder. If I walk away, will I go to hell? I put it on a book. I sit there and I write it and I put it on a book and I wait. For someone who loves typing I sure can’t think of more than worthlessness to say sometimes. I sit there and I write anyway, like this. And then the five-word thought comes back. There’s something wrong with me. There’s something wrong with me. There’s something wrong with me. I put it on a book and then I sit there and I think there’s something wrong with me. I think there’s something wrong with me. There is something wrong. I sit there and I put it on a book and I think there’s something wrong with me.
19th February 2009 at 5:13 am
This degenerates nicely. In part it reads almost like an automaton is talking and once IT gets to the end it beeps and begins the ‘thought’ again. Of course I read it wrong the first time and I thought you were putting a book on, an audio book. I thought the beep was to indicate the end of the side.
19th February 2009 at 2:56 pm
Ani, this is stunning. I love it.
19th February 2009 at 6:20 pm
Once again you’ve managed to prick straight through to how I’ve been suffering lately. Whether it’s how you meant it or not. Thank you.
19th February 2009 at 8:46 pm
This is mesmerising from start to finish. There.
19th February 2009 at 10:13 pm
I love it too. Another crack in the wall.
19th February 2009 at 10:59 pm
Jim: Ha. That’s an interesting interpretation. The last audio book I listened to was, I think, either a William Burroughs or Jack Kerouac CD - during my beat phase when I was seventeen.
L: Gracias, amiguita querida. ;)
Asia: And once again I am sad that you should feel that way while simultaneously relieved that I am not alone. So you see, all in all, quite conflicted. No change here, then.
AUW: Aw. You say the nicest things, Mr Unreliable.
Chris: Wow. I should post about sitting around and waiting more often.
20th February 2009 at 3:18 am
The only thing wrong with you is that you own a device that beeps. Grrl, nothing’s supposed to beep anymore, unless you’re in a hospital. I want you embrace yourself, ringtones and vibrations.
20th February 2009 at 11:42 am
I like this. Great tension, suspense, questions, repetition. I think it went on just long enough, and not too long. Well done.
20th February 2009 at 4:01 pm
there is something wrong with you that is oh so right
oh so right
20th February 2009 at 7:04 pm
Jack: No no Jack, this is the kind of beep I like. It’s the kind of beep you wait for.
Jem: Thanks, Jem. I don’t think I ever go on too long, I get bored of myself very easily.
Robb: My low self-esteem thanks you, Robb. I liked your story on 3AM, too. ‘Rake my ragged knuckle’ is a phrase that stuck to my brain.
20th February 2009 at 9:04 pm
Really glad you liked it. Thanks for the link :-)
21st February 2009 at 7:29 pm
Thus Ani Smith gained enlightenment.