I can’t because I don’t

13th January 2009

Who is it that fills this space with noise, when no one else can see? All these special fuckers with something to say and you, armed with sugar-free gum, a wireless mouse, 47 minutes of free time exactly, and a brain filter the size and feel of that mahogany writing desk where I carved Fuck you, dad! - lovingly illustrated and with sterling punctuation.

All to be heard, and there’s no denying some are louder than others. And you there - in the far corner, by the escalator: what’s your deal? Rustle me up some of that good old life heartbeat and I’ll burst a vein and fellate you for the intimacy.

Talk to me, because I’ve forgotten how to be solid and still and I’m a mass of writhing tongues, pounding chests and even a handful of butterflies. Canary-yellow-butter-flies, fluttering sweetly in the acrid depths of my putrid bowel.

It’ll be so much fun!

9 responses

  1. Jack Smynde comments:

    You have such a neat perspective. What you show, hide and make up swirl like a carousel, and I want on it.

  2. Ani Smith comments:

    Why Mr Smynde, are you flirting with me?

    [I suppose it’s only fair to warn you that everyone leaps off this carousel puking eventually.]

    ;)

  3. clarissa comments:

    Can butterflies smell?

  4. Jim Murdoch comments:

    I am curious about the title because it reminds me of something from my childhood, something my dad always came out with when I said I couldn’t do something: “Can’t means won’t.” I know he meant well but maybe that’s why both he coped and I cope so badly with growing old; I can’t do the things I used to do. Desire and determination don’t enter into it.

  5. Ani Smith comments:

    Clarissa: My you are a curious little thing.

    Jim: Indeed, I was saying precisely what your father said, only in reverse. In my mind it was: ‘I can’t [stop] because I don’t [want to]’.

  6. ty comments:

    [I suppose it’s only fair to warn you that everyone leaps off this carousel puking eventually.]

    Rad.

  7. jem comments:

    even a handful of butterflies’ - I’m learning that butterflies as a creative image can be used in so many weird and wonderful ways. Gone are the days when they were just a pretty pretty symbol.

  8. Ani Smith comments:

    Ty: Dude!

    Jem: Butterflies are the cheapest quickest way to bring about the idea of that stomach feeling. I hate that though, that’s why I tried turning them on their pretty little heads. ;)

  9. Matthew comments:

    thank you for canning and doing. I’m a terrible talker but i can listen a mean streak.

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