Delusive Snippet #6
I have beauty marks.
No, really, it’s true. Well okay, maybe it’s only half true. You see, I have three small, latte-coloured spots on my chest which an old lover called my ‘Bermuda Triangle’. I also have one on my shoulder. Sometimes I catch sight of this one out of the corner of my eye and for a half a second I think it’s a bug. It used to soothe me to remember that it is a beauty mark because, as the name implies, it must mean I’m beautiful.
Then I decided to research beauty marks on Wikipedia (as you do) and had the misfortune of learning that only facial moles can be called beauty marks and that my beauty marks are just plain old moles.
I am going to edit that stupid article.
20 November 2007 at 11:16 pm
Beware the wrath of the WikiGod!
“It might be a tumor.”
“It’s not a toomah!”
20 November 2007 at 11:50 pm
I have a beautiful mole. Not a beauty mark. But a beautiful mole.
He is called Nigel.
21 November 2007 at 3:20 am
I used to have one a little one right where you would expect a beauty mark (just below and to the left of my mouth). It was perfect.
I don’t know exactly when, but at some point in it’s little life it faded. No one else knows it’s there. But if I look really, really closely I can just make it out.
I used to have one on my butt where you wouldn’t expect a beauty mark — where according to Wikipedia it would have been a mole (or possibly a freckle because there was nothing raised about it). My mother pointed it out to me when I was 6 or so. I wonder if it’s faded too.
21 November 2007 at 4:39 am
Just tell other people firmly that they might have moles, but you have beauty marks. And to put that in their pipe and smoke it.
21 November 2007 at 9:53 am
2ndhandsoul: Ssshh. Don’t say the T word. I’m too young to die!!!
AUW: Might we inquire as to the exact coordinates of Nigel’s whereabouts on your person?
Clarissa: Upon further research I have concluded that some of mine may actually be age spots. I am outraged, quite frankly. (And NONE of them are raised, thankyewverymuch!)
P.S. I suggest a couple of mirrors and a thorough bum inspection at once. I also expect a full report of your errr, findings.
Z: This is exactly what I intend to do. Age spots
onmy arse!21 November 2007 at 11:10 am
You are beautiful.
21 November 2007 at 12:47 pm
Freckles. I like calling them freckles. Makes me sound young and frolicking, somehow.
21 November 2007 at 1:42 pm
I have one in that little dent above my lip.
My mum used to think it was dirt and did the spit and hankie thing.
21 November 2007 at 11:58 pm
Well, I AM a beauty spot - so Wiki can f**k off
(think positive like I do, in a Gothic sort of way)
22 November 2007 at 11:40 am
Lillipilli: Thank you! Can you come back and remind every day, please?
Bohémienne: Yes, the word ‘freckles’ does have a fresh, vibrant feel. I like it. Good call.
Isabelle: Ha! Oh how I hated that motherly spit polish. Where did they all learn it?!
Spanish Goth: But you are supposed to be all gloom and doom and bat head-eating and such. ;)