42
I’m not fucking pretty, bitch I’ll cut you.
Yes yes another fucking cursing rant this is becoming habitual yes yes unoriginal yes all that but you know what? Fuck you. Yes, fuck you because I’m mortified that I’m mortified what are they thinking? What will he think? What will they think? Fuck what you think no no no I don’t mean that I don’t mean that at all. I need you I need you I need please please please. What is wrong with me? What is wrong me? Why is wrong with me. Why. Why. There it is again, yes that fucking word, yes. No, I don’t want sympathy I need substances, yes many and varied hardcore substantial, mainline fucking right into the vein the brain the pain. Ooh, I’m so good at this so good so fucking good. And sex, yes sex, don’t blush now we’ve only just begun lots of guiltyshamefuldirty hair-pullingassfucking ripmeopentearmedown SEX. Oh I’m sorry is this making you uncomfortable? No no of course not why would it it’s not you it’s me it’s all me fuck me. Why? Oh, no not again. Yes why, why fucking why. Who are you? And you? Who the fuck are you? Who am I? To you what am I? What is this? Why fucking why. Fucking why?
I DON’T FUCKING KNOW WHY.
31 July 2007 at 5:45 am
Shit, Ani. Nice cup of tea? Razorblade? Anything I can offer?
31 July 2007 at 8:45 am
Good news. It’s Tuesday.
And moreover.
The sun is up. The sky is blue. There’s not a cloud to spoil the view. But it’s raining … raining in my heart.
And far be it from me to disagree with Z, but coffee. Always coffee. At least thirteen cups.
31 July 2007 at 10:16 am
Oh, yes please! Razorblade, rustier the better.
Oh all right, I’ll go for the coffee.
[Seriously, thank you both for the smile.]
31 July 2007 at 11:22 am
why 42 ?
that was my first thought.
I think she wants some ,was my second.
31 July 2007 at 11:43 am
Isabelle: simply because 42 is apparently the Ultimate Answer to Everything. But the question is, why?
As to your second thought well, err… no comment.
31 July 2007 at 12:11 pm
Ah yes, 42. And of course the question is why. Hug?
31 July 2007 at 12:41 pm
oh yes, I never thought of that !
As to why, I have no idea either, none at all. But ”guiltyshamefuldirty hair-pullingassfucking ripmeopentearmedown SEX ” is as good an answer as any.
I reckon anyway .
31 July 2007 at 12:45 pm
Bohémienne: Yes, hugs, please. Lots.
Nearly all my favourite bloggers commenting on one sick and nasty post with humour and kindness. I am feeling the love. :)
31 July 2007 at 1:16 pm
That is one heck of a lot of fucks :-)
31 July 2007 at 1:32 pm
Okay. You’ve had your hissy fit, dear. Can I drop the humour and kindness act now, please? It’s so not me.
31 July 2007 at 1:46 pm
Philip: Welcome. Please don’t tell my mother that all that washing-my-mouth-out-with-soap was in vain.
AUW: Thank you. Your words are like a welcome finger to the back of the throat after a serious candy binge.
31 July 2007 at 4:29 pm
UW, I agree about the coffee, but in times of crisis I like to offer a cup of tea, a cigarette, and an ineffectual pat. Then I stand around looking anxious saying: “God, you’re not going to cry, are you?” So that’s what I was virtually doing. But I have a good supply of razorblades too, if need be.
31 July 2007 at 10:22 pm
Try greasing yourself up, don a loin cloth and run screaming “13” while swinging a gladius through numerous backyard BBQs in any neighborhood. It always seems to make me feel better.
1 August 2007 at 12:22 am
Z: I knew exactly what you meant.
Venus: Hm. I have to say, I’m far more courageous in writing.
6 January 2008 at 8:26 pm
Hi Ani,
In the book “Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy” Douglas Adams writes that after much consideration and computation by the super computer “Deep Thought” the answer to the “Ultimate Question” ( i.e what is the true meaning to life, the universe adn everything?) the answer is…42.
I’ve adopted that as my nom d’ plume as it really is the only one that makes any sense whatsoever. Mostly, it just confuses people.
So, short answer gone terribly wrong, reading the series of books by Mr. Adams will clear it up. Also, they are loads of fun to read.
Glad I finally stopped by! 42